Let me go on

Violent Femmes                                                                        1982

by Violent Femmes
8.6/10

How about we just play music?

What do you mean?

Let's just play music the way God intended. No effects, no bullshit. Just pure music.

But will people like it?

Fuck the people! Can't you see where rock music is headed?

I don't think is going to be that bad, will it?

Oh it's gonna get bad trust me. The other day I heard this new Styx song on the radio, horrible shit.

Really?

Horrible shit.

Who would have said huh? You would think this decade is going to be good for music. I'm still optimistic.

How the fuck can you be optimistic with all this glam metal going on? For fucks sake, I don't know how we'll ever recover.

[God interrupts the conversation]

Don't worry children. In the future there will be a band, and it's name will be the "Pixies" and they will fix all the problems.

Pixies? That sounds kinda of gay God.

Don't worry about it.

But why are you telling us this?

Because you need to get off your ass and make this record you've been thinking about all these years. That will set off a chain of events leading to the creation of the Pixies. Plus, I want to hear "Blister in the Sun" on vinyl.

You know about Blister in the Sun?

Yes dammit, I'm God! Now hurry up I'm getting anxious.

Wait God before you leave, this record that we're going to make, will it make us a famous as Kiss?

No unfortunately not.

Will it at least make us rich?

Uh...not for a couple of years, but even then it won't be that much.

What???

Yeah that kinda sucks doesn't it?

Wait God I don't understand, if you are all-powerful then why can't you just change it so our music will be more popular than the current glam metal shit that's going on? Look at Motley Crue for example, look at how they're hurting music, can't you give Tommy Lee the gay virus or something, make it look like an accident?

No Tommy Lee is going to live a good long life, bang one of the hottest girls ever and make a shit load of money doing it. Oh, and he's well endowed too.

What the fuck God? Why can't there be justice?

Because if there were justice, thirty years from now Favian wouldn't have any ideas for this review and that Gordon, is simply something I can't allow.

Review by Favian Lobo